O, how it hurts The sting of solitude! I'm quenching on my own My solitude is going to kill me
O, how they tighten The ropes around my neck! What have I done to myself? From this self-made hell Who is going to save me?
As I'm laying here With my eyes closed I can see you smiling, drowning in joy I reach out my arms; beg to touch your face But you stand there motionless Waving from the other side
Childhood memories: tears of happiness in my eyes Sitting in the middle of a crowded room Around me joyous faces -those who loved me They are all here for me -I'm the pride of the room Beautiful paintings on the walls Someone throws a match into the fireside...
Where are they now? Please, tell me! As this pain cuts me in two And nobody is here to heal my open wounds Alone I am dying, alone I am crying I pray for time to come and take The remains of what seems to have been me...
Even the shadows of time have abandoned me They left terrified by the empty look On my scarred face Time has forgotten me I'm getting older every day but I never die
"The time has come to end your life:say a last goodbye to the world" "I can't do such a thing" "What are you waiting for? The world doesn't need you. Die like a honourable man" "NEVER! I shall live and learn to bear this damned pain!"
2. Don't Mourn
Don't mourn now for your lost life and what did you do to deserve it? it was just a bitter gift
Pull yourself together and with your last strength make a final prayer thank for the precious present... death
The emptiness consumed your weary soul ate you from inside like a parasite But death came -like a prince on his white horse- and set you free with a last, sweet kiss
Don't dwell now like a ghost around your dead body flee into infinity
My God-forgotten love, finally we'll meet again when our both souls dissolve into infinity... death awaits
No time to dwell in limbo... shadows are here to get you how they want to embrace you in their cold arms and drawn you in the pool of tears of those who suffered because of your sins
Follow the right path which leads to the astral constellation where your soul enters the gate before the light dies away Save yourself from them the creatures without a shape have followed you in your last trip
You are safe again you entered the portal their black arms couldn't get you
Wait for me there as you sit motionless with you arms around your knees you are free now
3. Time
It's time to move on Time to leave my shelter And step into this world I had turned my back to
Time to find some joy Time to share some happiness My God, I forgot how to love and hate
Is this the world? Is this my new shelter? How could I base my hope on this? Where can I find Some light into this darkness How can I build the fortress of truth On a foundation of lies?
It's time to say goodbye Time to move back into the shelter I created for my own good
Time to cover my eyes Not to see the faces That betray their cold indifference
But I shall return to burn their houses down -the houses built on lies and apathy- To claim back my place I have never found To break the silence With a cry of desperation
4. Envy Us
We, the dead, can not understand Why these mortals don't envy us In silence and peace we rest, but we don't exist
We have so many things in common Why are they afraid of us? We can't understand Our lives are over, theirs have no meaning What have they got that we don't have?
Beautiful is our realm Our kingdom no one can resist In solitude's eternal bliss Together we shall not exist
5. Curse The Morning Light
From a crack on my sealed window enters a ray of light It falls down at the foot end of the bed that I'm not going to leave (any more) I curse you morning light, spot on my solitude No one here to mourn with me the loss of hope in this life
The light that brings the day reminds me that I'm dead
I want to break out, I want to be free And leave behind these chains that keep me captive My life a ruin, it has ruined me I smell my soul rotting; it fades away with the years
O bastard life, for too long you fooled me You made me believe that you are worth to live
A growing fury, a growing pain enveloped my soul, paralysed my heart love is a lie, hope is a morbid joke every day the same old song
I want to break free from this vicious circle To hear some words of comfort, to breathe some joy
I have passed the point of no return since long: The gravity of this black hole is too strong Look at me, disappearing within its darkness My God, it hurts more than I could possibly imagine!
I must cope with the emptiness Which has weaved its web around my soul I've sunk in the abyss of desperation And yet I'm here, a fool among the fools
The hour has come... the angel of death looks me straight in the eyes like a basilisk He stands there staring with empty gaze- like an ancient statue and tries to break the shield which guards my empty soul But all those joyless years have eventually dried my tears drained every emotion of my well-worn body which slowly rots and disintegrates The angel smells the stench of slow death disgusted, he disappears into the night I cut my flesh with my broken nails enjoy the fluid of life flowing The cancer has left my heart and yet I'm more than ever dead...
